Trauma Wrapped Up as Religion

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
May 3, 2026
5 Easter
Acts 2:42-47
Psalm 23
John 10:1-10

When Homer Simpson became a missionary in the 11th season of The Simpsons, he went to some far away people on some small far away island, and he knew almost nothing about Jesus, or Jebus, as Homer called him. Back in Springfield, Homer had spent years faithfully sleeping through almost all of Reverend Lovejoy’s sermons, so when it came time for Homer to teach the people of this island about Jesus, he instead taught them what he knew, the joys of beer and gambling. They made a casino, and the people quickly fell to ruin as all they did was get drunk and fight. 

So, Homer decided he needed to do real missionary work and actually teach the people about Jebus. He told them something or other about Jesus, had them build a church, and when they finished, they were so proud of the church building they had made. Two of the people looked up at their beautiful building, and one asked the other, “How many times must we go to church to avoid Hell?” “Every Sunday for the rest of our lives.” “Hahaha – no, seriously.” 

They thought they were following Jesus, but they pretty quickly found a stumbling block. They had a really bad missionary. Sorry Homer, but he was a really bad missionary, and he left them with even worse theology. You gotta go to church every Sunday to avoid Hell. That’s ridiculous. Everyone knows you gotta go to church at least two times a week to avoid Hell.  

No, the bad theology was that the point of Jesus is avoiding Hell. That’s all Homer had really gotten from Reverend Lovejoy. Sure, he talked about other things too, but the basic crux of it was, believe in Jesus or go to Hell. That’s what Homer knew, so that’s what he taught. Little wonder then that as a missionary, he first led the people to a casino and beer. When your religion is threat of eternal torture and then a get out of torture free card, you have a religion that’s based on traumatizing people with threats of torture and then giving them the only option they’ve got. 

Well, as we know, drinking to numb anxiety and emotion is a fairly common trauma response. As it turns out, Homer wasn’t a bad missionary just because he had slept through Reverend Lovejoy’s sermons. The parts of Reverend Lovejoy’s teachings that had gotten through were a stumbling block to Homer being able to find anything good and healing about following Jesus. That bad theology had then turned Homer into a stumbling block for the people he was being a missionary to. Thinking that the point of believing in Jesus is to avoid eternal torture, that’s a stumbling block. That’s trauma wrapped up as religion.

“I am the way, and the truth, and the life,” Jesus said, “No one comes to the Father except through me.” That’s wildly different than saying, ‘If you don’t believe in me, you’re going to be tortured forever.’ Jesus did talk about judgment and punishment for the ways that we are horrible to one another. He talked about God bringing justice. Thank God for that. What Jesus didn’t do was give the very clear formula that so many preachers offer of “believe in Jesus, or go to Hell.”

In Matthew 25, Jesus told of people being welcomed into God’s kingdom not because of anything they believed, but because they took care of one another when they were in need. People took care of one another, which is the way of Jesus, and so Jesus welcomed them into God’s kingdom. They came to the Father through Jesus by following in the way of Jesus, without even knowing Jesus. 

That was at the end of the ages, and Jesus also talked about the kingdom of God and living that kingdom of God here on earth in this life. Jesus talked about how loving and caring for one another is how we live in God’s kingdom. Loving and caring for one another is how we enter into God’s kingdom.

“I am the way, and the truth, and the life,” Jesus said. You want to walk in the ways of loving and caring for one another, you want to walk into God’s kingdom? Then follow me, Jesus was saying. 

“Like newborn infants,” Peter wrote, “long for the pure, spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow into salvation— if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good.” Grow into salvation. Not get out of torture free when you die. Grow into salvation. 

What is salvation? Walking in the ways of Jesus. Bit by bit. Slowly learning to trust. Grow into a life that is trusting and following the teachings and ways of Jesus. For one thing we trust and follow Jesus’ teachings and ways by meditating on them day and night, as Psalm 1 teaches us. That’s a little thing, just a daily practice of prayer and scripture.

How about another practice, another little one from 1 Peter. “Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that in due time he may exalt you. Cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you.” Rather than drink away your anxieties or drug away your anxieties, rather than take all your anxieties out on everyone around you, give them over to God. 

Spiritual milk, slowly learning to trust in God and as we do, growing into salvation, into a life lived in love and joy. 

How about Jesus’ teaching about not seeking revenge against your enemy? Rather than get revenge, “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth,” Jesus taught to “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Everyone may not be ready for that one yet. You first have to have tasted that the Lord is good to trust that one.

A spiritual baby starts trusting Jesus slowly, bit by bit. Then as we grow, we learn to trust Jesus more and more, because we keep tasting that the Lord is good. We keep learning to trust, finding that we have greater peace when we do. Even when bad things happen, and Jesus promised bad things will still happen to us, we find those bad things easier to handle with a heart full of love and forgiveness than a heart full of anger and hate. 

Finding peace amidst the storms of life, that is salvation. Trusting in the goodness of God, even amidst the horrors of humanity, that is salvation. Seeing those who harm others as also being broken, and harmed, and in need of healing, that is salvation. 

Trusting in Jesus is salvation because by trusting in him, we get to walk in his ways, and we find our heats healed as a result. Unlike the trauma and fear preached by the Reverend Lovejoys of the world, trusting in Jesus gives us healing in this life and greater compassion for others. Even if all you’ve got is just a little bit of trust right now, that’s enough. Keep drinking the spiritual milk of that trust, bit by bit, slowing growing into salvation, growing into following Jesus as the way, and the truth, and the life. Keep drinking the spiritual milk of trusting in Jesus, slowing being led to a salvation that is so much greater than avoiding eternal torture once we die. Keep drinking the spiritual milk of trusting in Jesus, slowing being led to a salvation that is peace and love in this life, and peace and love that continues on after this life and into eternity.

Remember Who You Are: God's Beloved People

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
December 14, 2025
3 Advent, A
James 5:7-10
The Song of Mary Magnificat - Luke 1:46-55
Matthew 11:2-11

So, John the Baptist doesn’t seem to have been overly happy when he had his disciples go to Jesus and ask, “Are you the one who is to come, or are we to wait for another?” Jahn was in prison because Israel’s tiny, authoritarian, narcissistic king, Herod, had put John in prison for telling him the truth. Herod had married someone whom it was against the Jewish law for him to marry. When John told him that, Herod found John treasonous, and he wanted to have John killed immediately, but he chickened out and simply had him imprisoned instead. John was a political prisoner of a small and morally bankrupt king who even wanted to have sex with his stepdaughter, we find out later. 

John was understandably pretty upset at this point. It was hard times for Israel under Roman occupation. There was trauma, constant stress and fear, and it seemed like the whole world was against them. In that time of trauma, stress, and fear, John had given everything, his whole life to the idea that Israel’s messiah was coming and that Jesus was this savior who would rescue Israel from Rome, who would rescue Israel from their terrible and corrupt king. Then, as it turned out, John was imprisoned by this terrible and corrupt king, Rome still ruled over Israel, and Jesus didn’t seem to be doing anything about it. 

So, John wondered, “Have I been backing the wrong horse?” Is Jesus really the Messiah I have been claiming him to be? Have I been a fool, and am I here in prison for nothing? “Are you the one who is to come, or are we to wait for another?” John had his disciples ask Jesus. Behind that question was another question. “Are you gonna get me out of jail or not?” 

Jesus answered by telling John’s disciples to tell John what they saw. In short, people were being healed, and behind Jesus’ answer was, “No, John. I am not going to break you out of prison.” The messiah has come, and you are not going to see some world altering, monumental shift in the balance of power and world order. In fact, if you’re not concerned with the lives of the people around you, you may not notice much at all that the messiah has come.

Jesus helped, he served, he saved people, but he didn’t rule over the earth as a good-natured tyrant. He didn’t kill. He didn’t destroy. He didn’t force others follow his way and his will. That wasn’t the way of the people of Israel. God didn’t force the people to follow his way and his will. God offered his way and his will to Israel and told them that things would be better for them if they followed.

Sometimes they did, and things were generally better. Sometimes they didn’t, and things tended to be worse. In the dark times, those who stayed true to who they were as God’s people were the ones who found the light. 

So, when Jesus assured John that he wasn’t going to break him out of prison, and when Jesus told John that he was the messiah because people were being healed and the poor had good news brought to them, he was also telling John, remember who you are. 

John didn’t spend his life training people to become merciless killers so they could destroy Rome and kill king Herod. John spent his life reminding people of who they were: God’s people. John ministered to people in the desert, reminding them to follow God’s will and God’s way. That was how he prepared for the messiah to come, helping the people of Israel walk faithfully with God. John prepared for the messiah to come by guiding people to love God, to love others, and to let all of their actions flow from those two great loves. 

It should not have been a terribly great surprise then, that when the messiah did come, the way that he saved people was pretty darn similar. Love God. Love people. “What do you see, John? You see me loving God and loving people. With all the mighty power of God within me, you see me loving God and loving people. That’s how you know I’m the messiah.” 

So, I can imagine John being disappointed. Perhaps he was expecting something different: fires and earthquakes, floods and wars, and other apocalyptic craziness. Jesus didn’t bring that. Instead, he assured John that he was the messiah because he was healing people and giving them the good news that God is with them, even in the bad times, and that was Jesus’ message for John as well. “God is still with you, John. So do not despair, and do not lose sight of who you are.”

When we are in the midst of despair, we can lose sight of who we are. During hard times, with trauma, constant stress and fear, during times when it seems like everything is going wrong in the world, like everything is against us, Jesus is reminding us not to lose sight of who we are. We are beloved. We are God’s beloved, and we are made to be loved by God and one another, and we are made to love God and to love one another. We are made to join together in healing the hurts of the world. That’s who the people of Israel are.

When Jesus told John’s disciples that he was healing people and bringing them the good news that they are God’s beloved, he was reminding John of exactly what John had been reminding others of when he baptized them in the wilderness. We are God’s people made to heal the hurts of the world. So no, John, don’t wait for another. Remember who you are. 

Like the people of Israel, we too, as Jesus’ disciples, have been formed to help heal the hurts of the world. That’s hard to do in times of trauma, stress, and fear, feeling like everything is going wrong in the world or that the world is against us, and during those dark times, Jesus reminds us even more strongly to remember who we are: God’s beloved, made to love, made to heal the hurts of the world. During those dark times, we are reminded to seek help from Jesus, to stay true to who we are, trusting that we will find the light.

Even in the current darkness, our way is lit by love God and love people. That’s how we know where we’re going. That’s how we know Jesus is the messiah. We don’t need fires, earthquakes, wars, floods, or other apocalyptic craziness; we have quite enough craziness right now, thank you very much. 

So no, we don’t need to wait for another. We can follow Jesus and do what he did.

We may not get what we’re hoping for. John died in prison, but he died being the light. He died remembering who he was, God’s beloved, formed to help heal the hurts of the world. Whenever and wherever that healing happens, the messiah is here, and the savior reigns. Even in the darkness, whenever and wherever healing happens, the messiah is here, and the savior reigns.

What Does Life Sound Like?

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
August 11, 2024
Proper 14, B
Ephesians 4:25-5:2
Psalm 34:1-8
John 6:35, 41-51

“Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.” That sounds like life to me. Jesus said, “I am the bread of life,” and the way of Jesus which Paul described in that passage from Ephesians sounds like the bread of life that Jesus is. 

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.” Forgive one another for the sins committed against one another. See, God has already forgiven us of all our sins committed against God.  That was done by Jesus on the cross; any sins we commit against God, God has forgiven. No more sacrifices for sin. We’ve been made right with God. Done. Finito. We’ve received that bread and that life so that we can work toward loving one another. 

That is what Jesus gave his life for, so that we might be freed from the bondage of our sins, freed from the ways we’ve acted inhumanely, and with that freedom, we may try again to act more humanely the next time. Then, following in the way of God, Jesus taught us to forgive one another the sins we commit against each other. 

That sounds like life to me.  

We are all beautifully and wonderfully made beloved children of God. We are good. We are made good, and we are blessed. If we look then, at the idea of sin, we need to remember that the word for “sin” in scripture is an archery term, meaning “missing the mark.” 

You know what happens when you miss the mark? You get to try again. Jesus came to free us from sin so that when we miss the mark, we may be healed and try again. Jesus is the bread of life to get us back to the archery range, heal our woundedness, and strengthen us to hit the mark next time. When we don’t, we aren’t beaten by Jesus, we’re given correction, helped to hit the mark the next time. That’s the bread of life. 

Unfortunately, the ways we often treat one another when we sin, when we miss the mark, look more like this.

The archer shoots and shoots pretty well. Then, the archer misses once, and he’s punished. Now, he can’t shoot as well. He misses more and more often, and he’s punished more and more. Eventually, he’s imprisoned for how badly he shoots. In prison, he grows weaker and is injured further. Then he can’t even get his arrows to the target. He’s beaten even more. Does that sound like life to you?

In another case, the archer again shoots pretty well, but then when he misses, others really like it. It was a really great looking shot, and the plunk it made in the tree beyond the target sounded really cool. He keeps shooting at the tree, he keeps missing the target, he keeps getting rewarded for it, and others who are actually hitting the targets, they get ignored. Does that sound like life to you?

Some are punished for missing the mark. Others are rewarded, and we get so used to it all that we don’t even recognize the harm we cause each other because we’ve been beaten down and broken.

That doesn’t sound like life to me. It sounds like how we live a lot of the time, but it doesn’t sound like life. Unfortunately, pretty much of the time we see people routinely rewarded for ways they miss the mark, and we see people beaten down for ways they miss the mark. That’s not the bread of life.

For Jesus’ part, his way is to forgive us and correct us. That’s the bread of life, and yet even in the church, we often follow the way that is not the bread of life. We often follow the way of reward and punishment both for hitting the mark and missing the mark. What have we been doing for centuries in the church when people mess up? We’ve been threatening them with eternal torture.

Threatening people with eternal torture is beating people down for missing the mark. It’s traumatic, and as we beat people down with the trauma and fear of eternal torture, people become less and less capable of hitting the mark. So, they get more and more threats. That’s not the way of life. 

To be clear, Jesus does talk about punishment after this life for those who are cruel to others and for those who are indifferent to the suffering of others. 

What Jesus doesn’t do is give us a clear set of rules to know who deserves God’s punishment, who doesn’t, nor even what exactly that will look like and what the final purpose may be. We’re given glimpses. We’re assured that even when justice doesn’t happen here on earth, God will take care of that justice.

We don’t have a clear picture of what that will look like, and when we claim to know God’s judgement will be like, and when we claim to know who will and who will not be judged by God, we’re putting ourselves in God’s place, turning ourselves into our own idols. We aren’t given the tool of God’s judgement to beat one another down with when we see others missing the mark. We are given the bread of life. 

So, does the bread of life look like assuring those we feel are wrong that they will be punished by God while we will not? No, that does not look like life. When Christians make claims about who God will punish and who God will reward, what we’re doing is beating down and further breaking folks who we think are missing the mark. 

What we’re called to instead is to seek healing. We’re called to remember what sin really is.   

We aren’t forever corrupted and damned in God’s eyes. I know there are parts of scripture, particularly parts of Paul’s writings which, when misunderstood and read out of context, seem to say that we are broken and damned, but we are not.

We are God’s beloved children, and when God became human, God joined with us fully, so that we will know that we are blessed and wonderful.

In the book “To Life: A Celebration of Jewish Being and Thinking,” Rabbi Harold Kushner wrote, “For Judaism, sin is a deed, not a condition…a sin is not an offense against God, an act of disobedience. A sin is a missed opportunity to act humanely.”

We miss the mark by acting inhumanely, and we don’t heal acts of inhumanity by acting inhumanely ourselves. We heal acts of inhumanity by responding with the very best of our humanity, offering correction with love and helping each other hit the target next time. 

That is the bread of life which Jesus gave. “I am the bread of life,” Jesus said, and Paul described one way we eat the bread of life, by “putting away from us all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and being kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven us.”

“In returning and rest we shall be saved. In quietness and confidence shall be our strength.”

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets Episcopal Church
May 14, 2023
6 Easter, Year A
Acts 17:22-31
1 Peter 3:13-22
John 14:15-21
Psalm 66:7-18

“In returning and rest we shall be saved. In quietness and confidence shall be our strength.”

Has anyone else ever found themselves worshipping an idol, or is it just me? Interesting Sunday when the priest tells you he’s been worshipping idols, but I figure I should be honest about that when the sermon topic includes idol worship. Now, in our reading from Acts, Paul was talking about what we often think of as idols, little statues of gold or wood, and no, I’ve not bowed down and prayed to a little statue made of gold or wood. 

It was bronze…kidding. 

When Paul saw all of the things the Athenians had for their various religions, he saw idols, little statues, and he saw an altar to “an unknown God.” Paul let them know that God was not actually unknown, and pointed out that God is not anything like a little statue. God is not something that we make. 

God is, in fact, beyond all of creation. As vast as the universe is, all of the universe is contained within God. Anything that we could make or do is contained within God, for as Paul said, “In God we live and move and have our being.” Rather, than something we make, God made us and all of creation so that we would search for God and perhaps grope for God and find God.

Union with God is the deepest desire of our souls, and God is always united to us. The trick of the devil is not to separate us from God; that’s impossible. The trick of the devil is to have us think that we’re separated from God and then to think that something else will fill that void. 

In the Garden of Eden in the second story of creation, we find desire for knowledge as the first idol. Remember, God told the humans not to eat of the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, but the serpent told them that they actually should eat it, told them that God had lied to them. The serpent tricked them into thinking that their union with God was broken and gone. Then the serpent let them think that the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, would somehow replace their union with God, would satisfy their longing for union with God. Their union with God wasn’t actually broken, but the serpent convinced them it was and then lied to them about how they could fix their longing. 

Classic marketing strategy on the serpent’s part. Here’s a problem you didn’t know you had; now you can fix it by purchasing this.

Our souls want union with God. We actually have union with God, but our hurts and fears, our anxieties and traumas often keep us from realizing the unity we have. We feel a deep longing for peace. We feel great disquiet within ourselves, and we long comfort, for soothing, for some way to know that we are ok or to stop caring that we are not. In our hurts and fears, our anxieties and traumas, we seek all sorts of things which we think will fix us or fill us. 

Some seek money and power, never having enough, even when they’ve got more than they could need in multiple lifetimes. Others simply have enough, and yet they still fret constantly, worried about the future and if there will be enough. In either case, money can become an idol when it becomes our focus in soothing all our fears and anxieties. That’s one of the kinds of idols I was talking about earlier. If only I had enough not to worry about money, well then, I’d be ok. 

We have countless idols, not statues of gold and wood, things that we think will help soothe our souls. Being right and making sure we can prove others wrong can be an idol. Hanging on to anger and resentment can be an idol. Finding fault in others to make ourselves feel better can be an idol. The what ifs of the past or the if onlys of the future can be idols. Numbing and escaping reality can be an idol. 

So, now when I ask, “has anyone else ever found themselves worshipping an idol,” maybe you get my meaning a bit more? The kinds of idols I’m talking about: money, more, being right, resentment, anger, escape, what if, if only, numbing out…these kinds of things are idols I’m guessing all of us find ourselves turning to. 

My point is not, “Oh, we’re terrible idolaters, how awful of us.” My point is that we are hurting, and we tend to seek help in ways that don’t actually help us all that much. We unwittingly believe the serpent’s lie that our union with God is broken and any number of these other things will fix it. 

The truth is, “In God we live and move and have our being.” God is with us, among us, around us, in us, and through us all the time. So, when we set our minds on other things to fix us, we ignore the life all around us. When we turn to the idols of money and more; the idols of being right, resentment, anger; the idols of escape, what if, if only, and numbing out, when we turn to those idols, we block out God in whom we live and move and have our being. When we turn to these idols, we block out the peace we can have by turning to God in whom we live and move and have our being. 

I was talking with a gentleman a while back, seeking some peace, and we talked about prayer and meditation as ways to be with God, rather than disassociate from our fears and anxieties. 

We talked about having a rhythm of prayer. Rhythm has been found to help heal trauma. Our bodies are wired for rhythm. Our breath, our heartbeats, the steps we take, all in rhythm. There are the rhythms of the sun and the moon, night and day, the rhythms of the seasons. We’ve separated ourselves from a lot of these natural rhythms in modern society, and I believe that adds to our stress. So, adding in some rhythm of prayer can help heal our bodies, spending time with God in whom we live and move and have our being. 

In the Episcopal Church, we have a rhythm of prayer. Eucharist every Sunday. We also have daily prayer: morning, noon, evening, and night. Following this rhythm of prayer helps bring rhythm back into our lives and helps bring us into constant awareness of God’s presence with, and around, and within us. 

Another way to spend time in awareness of God meditation, specifically a meditation prayer called Centering Prayer. In Centering Prayer, you spend time in silence, focusing on your breathing, simply being in the present moment, aware of God’s presence around and within you. 

The way it works is you sit in silence for a few minutes, or up to twenty minutes, and you simply breathe. Before you begin, you choose a “sacred word,” generally something related to faith: God, Jesus, Love. Mine is Peace. The sacred word is used to draw us back to the center and back to the breath. As we sit in silence, thoughts will come, as thoughts tend to do, and when thoughts come, we say our sacred word in our minds to let go of the thoughts and draw us back to the present, to the breath.  

Centering Prayer is a way of letting go of our thoughts, simply experiencing the quiet (or the noise) of the present. Simply experiencing the quiet of breathing, of life around us. Simply experiencing God in whom we live and move and have our being.

The result is peace. 

Dwelling not in the past or the future, but simply dwelling in the present, focusing on the breath, breathing God in and out, we find peace. 

Rather than disassociate because of hurt and trauma, rather than use various idols, we can seek rhythm of prayer and meditation. We can seek to know and live unity with God, for it is God in whom we live and move and have our being. Union with God is the deepest desire of our souls, and despite the devil’s lie, we are still united with God. We always have been. When we let go our idols, when we turn to rhythm of prayer and meditation, we help our bodies realize the union with God that is always there. The union with God that is always with us. The union of God that brings us peace.