“If I apologize well enough, then you won’t punish me, right, God?”

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets
September 10, 2023
Proper 18, Year A
Psalm 119:33-40
Romans 13:8-14
Matthew 18:15-20

“If I apologize well enough, then you won’t punish me, right, God?”

Jesus taught us to forgive, over, and over, and over. As far and long as there is vengeance, that is how often we are taught to forgive. Boundless forgiveness.

Then we have Jesus today saying that if someone sins against you, talk with them about it, and if they won’t listen to you, bring a couple others to talk about it with you, and then if they won’t listen to you, take it to the church leaders, and if they still won’t listen, have them be excommunicated, like a gentile or tax collector, no longer a part of the community.

That sounds pretty harsh; we need to realize, however, that gentiles and tax collectors were the very people Jesus and his disciples reached out to in order to bring them into the community. If someone is no longer a part of the community, we’re to seek their restoration so they can be part of the community again. There is forgiveness even in removing someone from the community, boundless forgiveness.

Forgiveness is the way of Jesus because healing is the way of Jesus. Everything Jesus does and teaches is for our healing, even letting people be no longer a part of the community. “Let them be” like a gentile or tax collector, Jesus said. “Let them be” because that is the path they have chosen.

If someone sins against a person and refuses to acknowledge it, refuses to make amends and be reconciled, then they are kicking themselves out of the community. When everyone is fractured and against one another, there is no community, so by refusing to admit their fault, make amends, and reconcile, a person is either declaring the other to be outside or themselves to be. You can’t have community without reconciliation.

So, Jesus said, “let them be.” If someone wants to be not a part of the community, then let them, and remember, even that is for our healing.

So, what healing do we need when we refuse to admit our faults, make amends, and be reconciled to others. We need healing from anger, pride, resentment, and fear…these are what fill us when we refuse to admit our faults. Then, we end up blaming everyone and everything else around us. Our anger, pride, resentment, and fear end up growing and harming everyone around us as well as ourselves.

If we’re going to keep our hurts from leaching out and harming others, we need to take responsibility for our actions. Rather than spending our time looking at others’ faults, we need to be willing to look at our own faults. We need to admit to ourselves, to God, and to others the harm we have caused. There can be no healing unless we do.

That’s a tough pill to swallow, and I believe it is made even more difficult because of the fear at the root at the root of much of the Christian faith. We talk of Jesus’ boundless forgiveness, but we also hear a lot about threats of Hell, threats of eternal torture by the God who is love. Fear of eternal torture has been a part of our theology for centuries, and while we need to take God’s judgment seriously, a faith based on fear of eternal torture is not the faith of Jesus and is not a faith that leads to healing.

A faith based on fear of eternal torture and personal salvation from that torture leaves us with little room for grace toward others, grace toward ourselves, seeking forgiveness, and loving one another. Community is lost in each person’s quest to avoid eternal torture.

Personal avoidance of punishment is not the salvation Jesus has in mind for our healing. Rather, Jesus offers us union with God and one another, a community of love. The Church’s mission is “to restore all people to unity with God and each other in Christ.”

The salvation of Jesus would have us focus not on avoidance of punishment, but on love of God and of one another. The community of love and grace, how well we treat others, seeking and offering grace, forgiveness, and reconciliation, that is the salvation of Jesus lived out in our lives. Heaven or Hell? We’ve got plenty of that here already. There’s plenty of Hell every day in our lives and the lives of those around us. That’s the primary Hell Jesus is saving us from, healing our lives and having that healing follow us even after the grave.

So then, with that healing in mind, with our focus on grace and forgiveness, on love and community, admitting our faults to God and to one another isn’t so terrible a burden. Admitting fault and seeking forgiveness becomes not about avoiding punishment, but about living in love with one another. Admitting our faults and seeking forgiveness is not a deal we make with God. “If I apologize well enough, then you won’t punish me, right, God?”

No. Admitting our faults and seeking forgiveness is part of restoring ourselves to unity with God and one another. The next part of being restored to unity is making amends to others for the wrongs we have done and changing how we live. Jesus shows us grace, forgiveness, and restoration that we might live that same grace, forgiveness, and restoration.

When we cease caring about restoration to God and one another, we begin living outside of Jesus, and Jesus lets us do that. If we want not to be part of a community of love and restoration, Jesus lets us not be. Remember, the church is not a group of individuals avoiding punishment. The church is a community of grace and love.

If we don’t want to live in a community of grace and love, we don’t have to. If we do want to live in a community of grace and love, then we do have to let go of our anger; we do have to let go of our pride; we do have to let go of our resentment, and fear. That’s the reconciling community and life Jesus offers us. A life without fear, a life of joy, a life of reconciling love for one another.

Jesus offers us release from the burden of carrying all the harm we have cause others. Admitting our faults, admitting the harm we have done is a relief and a release, a laying down of a heavy burden. Might there be consequences when we admit what we’ve done? Sure. There is also grace, forgiveness, and love. There is healing. It takes time. It can be grueling, and it is worth it. The healing of grace, forgiveness, and love, the healing of a community of love, that’s salvation.

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