“If you want to be who you want to be, you have to give up who you are.”

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
July 12, 2026
Proper 10, A
Isaiah 55:10-13
Psalm 65: (1-8), 9-14
Matthew 13:1-9,18-23

What is the soil of your heart like? Can it receive and live the Kingdom of God here on earth? Jesus told a parable of the one who scatters seeds of the Kingdom of God. Depending on the condition of people’s hearts, they would receive and live the Kingdom of God here on earth, or they would not. 

The Kingdom of God here on earth is a life of faith and hope, trusting in God’s grace and love for us, trusting in God’s grace and love for every single person, ever. We believe that we are loved by God. We believe that we are forgiven by God. We believe that even after we die, will continue to live forever with God in God’s eternal Kingdom. 

So, with that faith and hope, Jesus teaches us to live the Kingdom of God in our lives on earth. Forgive people who wrong you, even if they don’t deserve it. Work to heal any damage you’ve done to others. Love those who love you, and love those who hate you. Rather than fight against a world that is full of problems, accept the things you cannot change, and lovingly live to help heal the things you can. Faith and hope build up the Kingdom of God, and they are built on the foundation of love.

In the parable Jesus told, he is constantly scattering the seed of that kingdom of faith and hope, built on the foundation of love, and as he scatters that seed, some people really don’t get it, just don’t understand. Their hearts don’t understand. Their hearts just can’t grasp the idea of a life of love, forgiveness, and service to others built with faith and hope. So, the idea of living God’s Kingdom of faith, hope, and love, is gone almost as soon as they hear it. 

As Jesus scatters the seed of God’s Kingdom, some love the idea, and they really want to start living a life of faith and hope. Other people they know, however think it sounds stupid and weak, and they mock them for such soft beliefs. So, they give up on the Kingdom of God because their hearts weren’t ready to live it without the total support of others around them.

Then, Jesus said there are some who receive the seed of the Kingdom of God, but they want power, wealth, and stuff instead. They put their trust in their own power; they want control over the world and the lives of the people around them. They don’t want to serve and heal the world, rather they want to force the world to be the way they want it to be. They may have a lot of money and power, or they only have a little bit of money and power, but either way, they want they everything to go their way, and so they reject the Kingdom of God to make the kingdom of themselves. They cause harm, so much harm to those around them, near and far.

Then, Jesus said there are some who receive the seeds of the Kingdom of God and they truly accept it. They choose to live a life of faith and hope, built on the foundation of love. These are the peacemakers, the merciful. These are the pure in heart, the meek, the poor in spirit. These are the ones who hunger and thirst for righteousness, the ones who mourn, the ones who may even be rejected and ridiculed for their way of faith, hope, and love.

When rejected and ridiculed, the ones who truly live the Kingdom of God don’t turn to their own power. They don’t turn to anger or rage. They offer their difficulties up to God, they accept what they cannot change, and they seek God’s strength to continue living a life of faith and hope as part of something bigger than themselves. 

When we see people shot on the Metro right beside us, we offer our fear to God, we leave rage alone, and we seek God’s strength not to be overcome by evil, but to overcome evil with good. 

When we hear of people being chased in ordinary looking cars and then shot by people claiming to be police, we offer our fear to God, we leave rage alone, and we seek God’s strength not to be overcome by evil, but to overcome evil with good. 

When we feel like we keep getting knocked down over and over again, we offer our fear to God, we leave rage alone, and we seek God’s strength not to be overcome by evil, but to overcome evil with good. 

When we have given up and decide to do whatever we can to numb and feel better, we turn back again, we offer our fear to God, we leave rage alone, and we seek God’s strength not to be overcome by evil, but to overcome evil with good. 

The seeds of God’s Kingdom are scattered over and over throughout our lives, and sometimes the conditions of our hearts aren’t able to receive them. So, we work on the condition of our hearts. We work to make the soil of our hearts ready to receive and live God’s Kingdom of faith, hope, and love. 

So, I’m going to sing a song by Guy Forsyth called, “Leave Me Alone.” It’s about a guy who wants to just be left alone, except that he actually desperately wants not to be alone. Maybe he’s been overcome by pain and hurt in his life, we don’t know, but we find in the end that he desperately desires to change so that he won’t always be alone.

Leave Me Alone - Words and Music by Guy Forsyth

https://www.guyforsyth.com/ (Sung with permission)

I’m all alone now, they’ve all gone upstairs.

I’m on my own now, except for the tables and the chairs.

Guess that’s what I wanted, you know I tried hard enough,

To make them leave me alone.

It used to scare me, now I crave it.

I keep joking about taking off to London.

Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

If I could, I would. I want to go, to go away,

To make them leave me alone. 

 

They all danced so well tonight,

Spinning cartwheels ‘round the moon.

I didn’t even have the strength to move my legs.

I didn’t even catch the tune.

If you want to be who you want to be,

You have to give up who you are.

Lie with your love, love with a laugh,

Laugh with a lie, life to your love.

Don’t let them see which one is me,

Or they will leave me alone.

Leave me alone.

When we find we want God’s kingdom and we just can’t seem to live it, we just can’t seem to receive the seeds of God’s kingdom, then we find we must give up who we are in order to be who we want to be. That’s resurrection. That’s Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 16:25, that, “those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it.” 

“If you want to be who you want to be, you have to give up who you are.” If you want to live God’s kingdom, but you just can’t seem to receive the seeds of God’s kingdom, then it’s time to turn around, to give up who you are and ask God to take control and guide you into who God wants you to be, and like in the song, that work is not done alone. We can’t become who we want to be, living God’s kingdom of faith, hope, and love, and be left alone. We join with our church and others in our church to live the life of God’s kingdom together, becoming merciful peacemakers, pure in heart, meek, poor in spirit, hungering and thirsting for righteousness, even as we mourn, even if we are rejected or ridiculed for our way of faith, hope, and love. We live the kingdom of God with others, dancing so well together, spinning cartwheels ‘round the moon.

The Armalite Rifle Won’t Save You

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets, Houston
May 11, 2025
4 Easter, C
Revelation 7:9-17

Psalm 23
John 10:22-30

“Come on, Jesus, tell us if you’re the Messiah or not!?” That’s what the people wanted to know. “Are you the Messiah, or aren’t you, Jesus?” Jesus responded that he had already told them, and they did not believe. Part of why they didn’t believe is because they were looking for a different Messiah.

When the people asked Jesus about being the Messiah, it was during the festival of Dedication, in other words, Chanukah. Chanukah is the feast of the consecration of the altar, over 100 years before Jesus, after the Israelites drove out the Syrians who had desecrated the temple. Having in mind Israel’s military victory over the Syrians, people wanted to know if Jesus was going to drive out the Romans. 

Folks in Israel had been looking for a revolutionary leader who would overthrow the Roman Empire ever since they took over Israel. Jesus just wasn’t their guy. When Jesus was on trial, the crowd told Pilate to release Barabbas, the revolutionary leader, rather than Jesus. Then, a few decades after Jesus’ death and resurrection, the Jewish people actually had a revolution against Rome, and that revolution ended poorly for Israel and in fact destroyed Israel.

“Are you the Messiah?” The people asked. Yes, Jesus was telling them, but you won’t see me as the Messiah because you’re looking for the wrong Messiah. You’re looking for someone to lead you into war and bloodshed. You’re looking for someone to kill your enemies and rule over others in a kingdom of power and might, and that’s just not the Messiah I am.

If you want a warlord as your messiah, that’s fine, and you’ll have a warlord’s salvation. Death, destruction, violence, anger, strife, and fighting forevermore.

That is not the salvation Jesus brings.

Jesus’ salvation comes through love and justice, mercy and forgiveness. Jesus taught that we don’t need to fight and kill to wrest our peace and security from others. Instead, we can seek peace though our unity with God, and then work with God to save and shepherd the lives of those we love (and the lives of those we don’t love). With Jesus as our Messiah, we seek to live God’s kingdom of love and peace, knowing that we won’t fully achieve the love and peace we desire. We strive for justice, knowing that justice will not be complete in this life. We recognize that the peace of God means others will see us as enemy, and we will not seek to dominate or kill them. The peace we fully seek will only happen one day, in that time and place of God’s making where we all “will hunger no more, and thirst no more,” where the “Lamb…will be our shepherd, and he will guide us to springs of the water of life, and God will wipe away every tear from our eyes.”

We won’t get that full peace in this life, but we strive for it anyway, and we get glimpses of that peace throughout our lives. We get glimpses of the peace of God’s kingdom as we trust in Jesus and love and serve others as he loved and served us, following the voice of Jesus, our shepherd Messiah.

That’s a very different voice than the voice of the warlord Messiah. If, like some of the people talking to Jesus in our Gospel reading today, if we are listening for a warlord Messiah, then we won’t recognize the voice of Jesus. Listening for a warlord Messiah, we’ll want to conquer, rather than comfort; to subdue, rather than serve; to lecture, rather than love.

Listening for a warlord Messiah, you won’t hear my voice, Jesus tells us, because you’re looking for the wrong Messiah.

I think of churches full of people who brought their Armalite Rifles, AR-15s, to church so they could have a service of blessing for their rifles. Ok, so that’s kinda nuts, and it makes me ask, who is the Messiah for such people? I suppose to be fair, just before Jesus was arrested, Jesus did tell his disciples to gather up some swords. I’ve even heard that said as a reason why Christians should be armed and ready to kill.

Of course that’s a misreading of scripture and ignoring half of the story. In Luke 22, Jesus did tell his disciples to get some swords. Then he told them why. It was so the scripture would be fulfilled, that he would be counted among transgressors. Jesus had no intention for his disciples to use the swords. Peter tried to when Jesus was arrested, and Jesus immediately told him and the rest of them to put their swords down.

I like to think that people who read Luke 22 and think we are supposed to get guns and be ready to kill are not intentionally misreading scripture, but that they are faithfully misreading scripture. I like to think that their reading is simply tainted by nationalistic fervor and a strong gun culture in America. When having a gun becomes synonymous with being a Christian, and being a red-blooded, gun-loving American becomes part of what it means to be a Christian, then we have mistaken Jesus for Barabbas, replaced the shepherd with the warlord.

Even without bringing guns to church for God to bless them, we still may end up following a warrior, rather than a shepherd. In the small, everyday battles of our lives, who do we follow, the warlord or the shepherd? When we come to church seeking blessing, do we intend to change our ways so that we may be blessed in order to bless others? In the words of one of our Eucharistic prayers, do we come to church “for solace only, and not for strength; for pardon only, and not for renewal?”

Looking to Jesus and hearing his voice, we get to follow Jesus as our shepherd, and we are called, as his sheep, to serve as fellow shepherds. We are called to care for others, and not just those we think are worthy, not just those we think are part of Jesus’ flock. See, the warlord tells us to create and ingroup and an outgroup. The warlord tells us to care for the ingroup and to keep the outgroup away.

The shepherd says, “Feed my sheep,” and the shepherd also says, “I have other sheep that do not belong to this flock.” We may think someone doesn’t belong, but that’s thinking like the warlord. Jesus said, “one shepherd and one flock.”

As Jesus’ sheep, called to live as shepherds, we are called to seek and serve Christ in all persons. We are called to strive for justice and peace and respect the dignity of every human being. The warlord doesn’t do that, and the warlord’s salvation comes in this life only, a salvation of death, destruction, violence, anger, strife, and fighting forevermore.

Jesus is the Messiah, because Jesus is a shepherd, calling us to live as shepherds, bearing one another’s burdens and caring for one another. Jesus’ salvation comes in this life and the next, in this life because we help to save each other from hell on earth, and in the next life because we will live with Jesus in that place where “we will hunger no more, and thirst no more; where the sun will not strike us, nor any scorching heat; for the Lamb at the center of the throne will be our shepherd, and he will guide us to springs of the water of life, and God will wipe away every tear from our eyes.”

Sharing the Music that Is In Us

The Rev. Brad Sullivan
Lord of the Streets
March 17, 2024
5 Lent, Year B
Jeremiah 31:31-34
Psalm 51:1-13
John 12:20-33

Sharing the Music that Is in Us

Jesus’ response to the news that some Greeks were looking for him seems odd. Really, most of Jesus’ responses to people in John’s Gospel seem odd. In this case, his disciples tell him some Greeks are looking for him, and he says, “The hour has come for the son of man to be glorified.” 

Just before this, Jesus had come into Jerusalem, and huge crowds had been cheering for him. While he was riding into town, the Pharisees looked to one another and said, “You see, you can do nothing. Look, the whole world has gone after him.” The fact that some Greeks had come to speak to Jesus seems to confirm what the Pharisees said. “The whole world has gone after [Jesus].” As much as they’d wanted to keep the whole Jesus movement from spreading, the cat was officially out of the bag and there was no stopping it now.

They were right. Early church had no buildings or organized support. They could not worship in the synagogues, nor in the Roman temples, and yet the church, spread like wildfire. People believed in Jesus. They trusted him. They found healing in Jesus. They found love. So, they ministered to others out of that same love, offering that same healing. 

As God had said through the prophet Jeremiah, “I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts; and I will be their God. I will forgive their iniquity, and remember their sin no more.” People were loved, forgiven, and healed, and God’s law, God’s love, was written on their hearts. 

See, there’s hearing and learning about the way of God’s love, and then there’s living the way of God’s love. As a musician, I think about the practice that goes into playing songs, getting them fully under your fingers and into your voice. You practice, and practice, and practice, and eventually, you leave the practice room, and you play the songs for others. There’s risk in that, risk in offering that music to be received by others, but it’s also a beautiful offering. When you’ve worked at it so the music is written in your heart, then it’s a beautiful offering and sharing of song and story. 

I saw Guy Forsyth play a show last week, and boy does he play. He practices a lot, and then he risks the stage. He plays those songs written in his heart, and his risk is worth it. His connection to the audience is beautiful. The stories he tells through his music, the human connection he brings, receiving his offering of music is healing.

When the music is written in your heart, then you can play, you can risk, and that brings healing and love to the world.

That healing and love is what happens when the Gospel of Jesus is written in our hearts. We leave the practice room, we risk, we play, and that brings healing and love to the world. 

Jesus talked about the risk of playing the Gospel. “Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies,” he said, “it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.”

Early followers of Jesus risked for the sake of the healing and love of the Gospel. They risked being kicked out of their synagogues, and they were kicked out of their synagogues. Gentiles risked being ostracized, and they were. 

The Gospel of Jesus demands risk. It demands being booed off stage, and if we are, ok. We practice some more, we allow the love and healing of Jesus to be written even more fully in our hearts, and we risk again. We risk not only for our sake, but for the sake of others.

We risk being peacemakers. We risk connection with one another. We risk offering the faith that is in us. We risk trusting in Jesus and following in his ways, rather than holding on so tightly to our lives out of fear of loss, that we end up hurting others and ourselves in the process. 

Our futures are uncertain. Jesus told us they would be. Following Jesus means risking that uncertainty. Jesus risked everything for our sake, for the sake of all people. “’Now is the judgment of this world;” Jesus said, “now the ruler of this world will be driven out. And I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.’ He said this to indicate the kind of death he was to die.” (John 12:33)

How did Jesus know that he would be raised and lifted up from the earth after he was crucified? My guess is he didn’t know it. He believed it. How did Jesus know that he would draw all people to himself? My guess is he didn’t know it. He believed it. How did he know that people wouldn’t simply forget, not believe, or ignore his life, message, and resurrection? My guess is he didn’t know it. He believed it. Jesus believed that people would receive his offering, receive his way of love and forgiveness. Jesus believed that people would receive the healing he offered and that they would then risk as he did to offer that same healing of forgiveness and love to others. 

Jesus believed in God, in forgiveness and love, and because of that belief, he risked everything for the sake of all humanity. He invites us, then to risk as well, for the sake of his Gospel and for the sake of humanity. Jesus invites us to risk for the sake of people who may hear, receive, and live the forgiveness and love of Jesus through the risks we take. Jesus invites us to risk forgiveness and love of others.

If we just talk about Jesus’ forgiveness and love to others, just tell people about it, then we’re really still in the practice room. If we mostly talk about Jesus’ Gospel, then I’m not sure it’s truly written on our hearts yet. When we live Jesus’ forgiveness and love, that’s when Jesus is written on our hearts. When we truly forgive and love others, that’s when we’re risking. Living Jesus’ forgiveness and love is when we’re out of the practice room and on stage, offering our music to others, making that connection, sharing the beauty and healing of the music that is in us.